Sophomore Year So Far...

I'm six weeks into the fall quarter of my sophomore year, and things haven't turned out quite as magically as I had hoped they would. Aside from the routine overload from a stressful class schedule and too many extracurricular activities, I feel like I haven't had the time to develop all the relationships that I cherished so much last year. I don't even get a chance to see Elaine or Lerma, and they live right next door to me! I don't know if it has to do with me being spread out way too thin, ineffective time management, or a combination of both, but part of me feels that I'm not getting the most out of my life here at Stanford because I'm dedicating so much of it towards achievement and building organizations.
Looking at the last couple of weeks (and even the last couple of months), I wonder if this is what I should be doing. I mean, I'm good at building organizations, but I feel that, especially recently, I haven't even been doing that well because of all of my commitments. Dv8 isn't close to where I wanted it to be from last year, and I'm struggling to find my place at the top of the group. I feel that no one really respects the ideals that the team stands for (mainly dedication, innovation, and community) and that almost no one truly loves dancing. I even find myself doubting my passion for the craft, and I always thought myself an crazed enthusiast of hip-hop. At this point, I don't know what I should do. Should I work to inspire my teammates? How can I inspire if I often find myself without inspiration? Should I work to serve my own artistic interests? How do I do that without contradicting the ideals of community upon which Dv8 was founded? I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place; I just hope that I'll find the means out and thrive upon escape.
Then there's school. Escuela. I'm definitely not doing as well as I should be. I've already had to drop a class this quarter because I couldn't find time to study for it, and I'm still struggling to even stay behind in my CompSci and Urban Studies classes. At least I'm learning a lot in Spanish. I have less than five weeks left in the quarter with one midterm down and two approaching (both of which I am completely unprepared for). I'm wondering whether I have what it takes to overcome these obstacles and succeed. I pray that I am given the strength and diligence to do so, but right now, prospects aren't looking so hot.
I guess, in retrospect, I just need to get a hold of myself and my life. I'm not used to this much responsibility and taking on responsibility for others, but I'm going to need to learn if I'm ever going to grow as a leader and as a person. It's essentially up to me to make the most of this journey and to take what I can from it. Time will tell. It is my hope that the next time I write an entry here, it will be one of celebration and triumph.